Tzav Rishon

So I'm officially in the IDF database!

This past Monday my entire garin (the group of kids I'm living with that are also joining the army- we're not all joining the same units though) had tzav rishon. That literally translates into "first step" but in real English it would mean something like "first summons". Pretty much its just when we all go and get poked and prodded by doctors and do physical tests and written tests and putz around until they give us our profile (the number out of 97) and our kaba (the number out of 56)

So we get there and woopdie doo, theres no air-conditioning. That's right. Over 50 kids in a room in Be'er Sheva and no AC. ONe by one kids are getting called into this room. I'm obviously nervous so I whip out my Harry Potter (number 4) and started reading about the Yule Ball and how Harry wishes he went with Cho but he went with Pavarti instead!

Anyways, I get called into the room and sit with a soldier. She starts asking me all the questions - "are your parents still together" "how many siblings" "whats your address" etc. etc. It took a freaking year, but eventually we moved on to the Hebrew test which was her showing me a sentence, me reading it and saying what it meant. I also had to write sentences that she would dictate- all of which were level 90897653 and most Israelis wouldn't even understand.

Apparently I scored high enough on that to take the psichotechni (test that all incoming soldiers have to take to show their intelligence) in Hebrew. EVERYONE ELSE took it in English, even the kids who have perfect Hebrew and sound completely Israeli. I was literally THE only one who took it in Hebrew and didn't understand why... I mean legit I barely freaking speak the language.

So everyone else who was taking it in English finished in about 20 minutes but my test was like the freaking SAT so it took about 1.5 hours. Turns out my best friend and roommate Talia took it in Hebrew also. We were both totally freaking out because here we are, getting judged on the same level as everyone else (the score affects your profile which in turn affects the jobs you can get as a soldier) but we had the test about 89764 times harder in a language that is by no means our mother tongue!

(blast that Gittleman and Schechter for teaching me to read and write well)

So the soldier who is in charge of our garin and lives with us on the kibbutz came up to Talia and I today and told us that the office called her and said that we each did well on our tests. Not amazing, not to our "highest potential", but we did well. Well enough for Talia to be a moshakit-tash (social worker for the army) which is what she wants to do. She told us that it wasn't fair that we had to take it in Hebrew and the army is now saying we have the option to take it again in English and potentially raise our scores and profiles.

Here's the catch: we have to write a letter of appeal, translate it to Hebrew, send it back to the office and then wait for the next day we can go in to retake the test. That's not really so bad. The thing is that all of this waiting may push back our enlistment date because the whole process will be delayed. Meaning, the entire garin will be enlisting around november and Talia and I might be stuck on the kibbutz with nothing to do until February just because this FREAKING army can't get their shit straight.

Then again we might be able to take the test right away. Who knows?

The other thing is: there is a "yom me-ah" which all girls go to and get evaluated by specialists. Its a good thing, it can raise your profile a lot and totally cancel out the test grade. Pretty much the specialists see how well you work with electronics, other people, the Hebrew language, etc. etc.

I don't really know what to do. Any suggestions?

Jerusalem

I never know how to start these things. Maybe "dear diary" ? Or, "to whom it may concern" ? And who does this concern anyway??

Well, I'm back from a very interesting weekend in Jerusalem. I left the kibbutz on thursday afternoon and got my little toosh on a bus from be'er sheva to tachanat merkazit (central bus station) in Yerushalayim. The bus ride was actually incredibly interesting. Thursday afternoon is when all the soldiers get to go home for Shabbat so getting on a bus is a freaking shit show. I'll explain it like someone throwing $10 and everyone going nuts to get it.

Luckily, my charm and good looks scored me a seat on the bus. Others weren't so lucky- they had to sit in the aisles (Israel really doesn't care about safety hazards). So a lot of soldiers were sitting in the aisle and I felt really guilty because HELLOOO KAVOD! (respect). I asked (a not ugly looking) soldier next to me on the floor if he wanted my seat, cause in NY if you see a soldier you get the hell up!

Anyway, he said no, but we got to talking and it turned out that he had been living in gush katif (a Jewish settlement in Gaza) and was evacuated in the 2005 evacuation of gaza operation. It was so interesting to meet someone who was really directly impacted by that government decision. 

I got to Jerusalem which looked exactly as I left it. I reached the dorms of Hebrew U where I got to see a lot a LOT of friends: Michelle Cimbol, Talya Frankel, Sam Perelgut, Liz Traison, Noa Orzy etc. (shout out to everyoneee xoxox) <-- I do love them, but thats me making fun of the jap vernacular

The weekend was lots of fun, just a whole bunch of parties and laughing and silliness. I'm so happy I finally got to spend a really nice and observant Shabbat. The reason I went to Jerusalem was for my friend Michael Chaikoff's brother's bar mitzvah, which was at the Inbal Hotel near Yemin Moshe and it was sooo beautiful. They had me for Friday night (5 course) dinner and I got to sit next to Ellen (mama Chaikoff) who is absolutely the best ever. 

Saturday morning we went to shul in Yemin Moshe, and then sweat our asses off as we walked back to Talya's sisters apartment. I also got to see my Rabbi's wife Shevy, who I'm in love with, and my friend Esther. We met them at their friends GORGEOUS penthouse apartment in Jerusalem.

Anyway, back to the desert wishing it was okay to walk around naked (its so hot)

<3 (thats a heart)

Family Reunion

First off, let me say that I GAVE BLOOD FOR THE FIRST TIME TODAY! I am no longer a giving-blood virgin.

And now back to things that matter: This past shabbat we met our kibbutz families, which are people from the kibbutz (families actually) that "adopt" us in order to make us feel more at home. They're supposed to host us and take us in as one of their own, feed us, buy things we need for us, etc.

We played this cute "marco polo" type game where all the families got the name of the kid that they're hosting and all the kids got the name of the family thats hosting them. We all met in a field and started yelling the name written on our paper until we found each other.

I'm paired up with a family that I already kind of knew. They have a daughter named Nofar who just got out of the army about a month ago and sometimes comes with us to the pool. She's really fun, and I'm excited that she's my sister =) The parents are olim (immigrants) from argentina but they've been in Israel for so long that they speak, read, etc. fluently.

They also have two other sons, but one is married and lives off the kibbutz and the other lives with his girlfriend and lives off the kibbutz, too. The middle brother is super attractive but I guess thats considered incest these days.

ANYWHO! that's it.

round the kibbutz

Netafim - the drip irrigation company of the Kibbutz

nothing too exciting to report.. life on a kibbutz is awesome (interesting, special, definitely worth it), but its not so exciting.

The other day we went to the #1 money making thing the kibbutz has: netafim. its a drip irrigation company that they started YEARS ago and tried to implement in desserts around the world. they make mad money through this, and have also managed to turn a legit desert into a beautiful green oh-ah-zeeees (thats how you say "oasis" in hebrew). they have businesses all over the world including mexico, australia, south africa, etc. we went to the factory which was huge and I was playing with all the plastic thingies that are used to make the irrigation dropletes in the tubes.

then yesterday we went on a little tour around the kibbutz to see how they make their living and to get familiar with our surroundings. We went to the refet (cow place.. smells like shit) and everybody was freaking out and trying to touch the utters. I mean, nipples are fun, but not THAT fun.

After that we went to the 2nd biggest money making thing the kibbutz has: chochova (jojoba). they grow the beans and have a place where they squeeze and process them to get all this awesome oil thats used in makeup and cosmetic products worldwide. the guy who showed us around gave us a free sample and I applied it to my super dry legs. maybe now they'll finally hydrate

cheers from the desert !

Kibbutz Hatzerim

Shabbat :)

Before I get into my first Shabbat on the Kibbutz, let me just say that the air conditioner is a two faced friend. It's a life saver but also makes you freeze your a$$ off at night when my silly roommates insist that we keep it blasting.

Now that I've effectively complained about something thats not worth complaining about, let me post the song I'm listening to which is AMAZING (and not a new song, but still worth listening to) and talk about Shabbat!

song: Chalomot Shel Acherim by Idan Raichel.

Shabbat: so our madrich (counselor type person) told us that for Shabbat we need to wear something thats nice.. so silly me I put on a dress while all the other kibbutzniks were wearing jeans and a semi-nice shirt. Oh, Israel.

After a small kiddush and candle lighting ceremony we had dinner. To be honest, I really missed doing something extra special for Shabbat, like Kabbalat Shabbat (Friday night songs/services). I know Israel is mostly non-religious and I wasn't expecting anything when I got to the Kibbutz but still, I missed it. So after we partied with the kibutznik kids that just got back from the army for the weekend (lots of fun, the kids are great and have lots to help us and share with about the army) I got back to the room and played some Shabbat songs, but it wasn't the same.

anyways this computer is burning my lap and its 2 AM. I told Oren (a friend from the garin) that I'd run with him at 7 in the morning (gotta get ready for basic training!) but I don't think thats happening.

<3

The Tekes

Sabra plant


Garin Tzabar (literally, the “Sabra seeds,” or the “Sabra unit”), is the program that is facilitating the process that will lead to my enlistment in the Israeli Army in late November. Garin Tzabar is a program run by Israel’s major youth movement (Tzofim) that places groups of new immigrants on Kibbutzim, where they live together for three months before individually serving in the army for a minimum of two years.

For those of you who don't know, tekes means "ceremony" and I'll be using that word A LOT cause Israelis are obsessed with ceremonies. They have one for everything.. when people get married, bar mitzvahed (haha okay thats my attempt at a bad joke). But seriously, everything here is a tekes.

So early this morning (and by early I mean at 2 PM) there was a tekes for all of garin tzabar (the program that I"m doing to join the army) at the shmolarsh auditorium in Tel Aviv University. It was awesome to finally see everyone in my garin again... really, so good. There are about 9 garin-eem (groups) and something like 250 kids joining the army from all around the US. I also saw the kid that held my hair back on the plane while I was puking, and picked him a flower in appreciation for his chivalry!

The tekes went on for ages... and everyone was getting really ancy. This one kid, in the middle of two speakers yelled "AD KAMA ZMAAAAAAANNNN" - which pretty much translates into "HOW MUCH LONGER". this would happen- but only in Israel.

what was really amazing is that I ran into two kids from my highschool back in New York. Naomi Spilka and Yechiel Szeinuk (definitely had to look that one up on facebook). They are both a year younger than me and joined the army last year through garin tzabar... so they came to the tekes with their units and didn't know I'd be there and it was a big ol' happy reunion.

We finally got on the bus and arrived at the kibbutz which is AMAZING. seriously. I'm going to live here for ever. In 3 months time when I'm expected to join the army they'll have to pull me out of my air conditioned apartment (YUP. AIR CONDITIONING!). I live in a room with my best friend Talia from Riverdale and we share an apartment with two of our other friends. And we have a kitchen, and wireless internet.

Living in the desert aint bad.

We had a tour of the kibbutz and all the women made us cakes and welcome signs and I love being here and everyone come and visit. OK?!

much love ya'll

Finally Here!!

Sophie's Goodbye Sign!

At JFK, better late than never!

Okay.. let me start by saying that my mother was so kind to buy  me a very nice camera about a year ago.. and it broke (because I got sand in the lens) and I was too lazy to send it in for the free warantee so now I'm stuck with  no camera (I'm sure my mother is gloating now...)

!! I'M IN ISRAEL

These feet are made for walkin' the holy land!

I got on the plane yesterday to find about 50 other kids joining the army. Nefesh b' nefesh was smart enough to seat us all together (probably to help us find our future spouses and create other Jewish kids). They told us not to switch our seats as they would be coming around with important documents to sign, but all of you reading this know me well enough to know that I switched my seat twice and ended up sitting rather far from my original assignment. Whatev, they found me anyway.

The flight was so fun. Obviously I didn't sleep. On my left was a guy named Alon who just graduated from University of Maryland and on my right was a guy named Josh from Colorado. Alon and I watched City of G-d- a crazy movie about Brazil. It was so intense, but good. After that I needed something to cheer me up a little, so I watched the 4th Shrek- which was not intense, and very good =)

I met a lot of cool people on the flight, and there were already 2 that I knew from my garin. I also ran into a kid that I went on Ramah Seminar with almost 3 years ago!! It was so silly to run into eachother- but fun, obviously.

My eye started killing from the dry air and lack of sleeping so I went around bitching to everyone asking for advil .. this girl gave me and also some eye drops. It felt better for about 2 minutes and then I puked twice. This kid Chad held my hair back (poor kid, he probably thought I was super drunk.. which I super wasn't. Then again he's probably used to these shenanigans). I had to throw out the bag with my puke in it and everyone was probably thinking "what a sissy". seriously- I never threw up on a plane before!!

About 30 minutes before we landed everyone started singing and cheering and clapping and the flight attendants had to force us to sit down. There was so much energy- it was so fun!! Walking off the plane we saw Shimon Perez (President of Israel) and he shook all the guys hands and kissed all the girls once on each cheek (what a playerrrr). Then we had an entire greeting commotion of people .. Israelis and soldiers and everyone welcoming us to Israel, passing out free water (wich I chugged), singing and dancing, saying "welcome home"...

My cousin Barry came to greet me which was really nice. aaaaaaaaaaaaaand then we had another tekes (ceremony) where I promptly fell asleep on this woman's shoulder (didn't know her). Whatever! It's Israel.

after taking a cab to even Yehudah where my cousins live, I fell asleep for 21 hours and just woke up. Sure, I feel like a lazy bum, but whatever, It's Israel!